Charlie Kirk: A Powerful Witness for the American Family

When someone has a powerful influence on the world, different factions will always clamor to claim that person as their own. This impulse is even stronger in death. So, in the wake of the shocking and horrible murder of Charlie Kirk, it is unsurprising that various groups on the right have begun to eulogize him and to claim him as one of their own. Conservatives claim Kirk as a witness to conservative, common sense values. Free speech advocates, from libertarians and classical liberals to conservative constitutionalists, remember him as “one of our nation’s greatest champions for free speech.” Christians of various stripes hail him as a bold and faithful Christian witness, even possibly a martyr for the faith.

All of these characterizations are correct, of course. Charlie was certainly all of these things. He was a devout Christian who proclaimed Jesus Christ constantly, a champion of free speech and civil debate, and an outspoken and unapologetic conservative. But as Brad Wilcox and Maria Baer point out in their excellent essay, the centrality of marriage and family was perhaps “Charlie Kirk’s most important message . . . that not only is freedom good, but that marriage, children, and family are the goods which freedom is for.” 

While there are many powerful advocates for marriage on the American right (including and especially the good folks at the Institute for Family Studies), Charlie’s witness and promotion of marriage and family was uniquely powerful. Why is that? He coupled a positive public message about sexuality, marriage, and family with a genuine personal witness, both through the love he showed his own family and the encouragement he gave to those around him to get married and have children. Charlie walked the walk and talked the talk.

The quotation attributed to St. Francis of Assisi exhorts us to preach the Gospel at all times—and to use words when necessary. Yes, we give witness through what we do more than what we say. Yet sometimes words are necessary; in our current culture, words about marriage and family are more necessary than ever. Marriage rates (just over 30 marriages for every 1,000 unmarried adults in recent years) are nearly one-third of what they were 50 years ago. Almost 1 in 3 single young adults today aren’t even sure they ever want to get married. Cultural acceptance of cohabitation, polyamory, same-sex unions, and intentionally childless romantic relationships have gutted the very meaning of marriage as the permanent union of a man and a woman with the purpose of rearing and educating children. 

In a world where the institution of marriage and the goodness of having children are under attack, silent witness to a happily married life is necessary but not sufficient. Charlie saw this crisis for what it was and used his platform to proclaim a pro-marriage message. This message was so central to Charlie’s public speaking that President Trump highlighted it: “We have so many bad philosophies, ideologies, politics … his was basically just good. He talked about family … go ‘get married’ … it sounds old fashioned when you think about it, but he’s right.” Yes, the sociological arguments for marriage and children leading to a happier life are important. 

Charlie Kirk coupled a positive public message about sexuality, marriage, and family with a genuine personal witness, both through the love he showed his own family and the encouragement he gave to those around him to get married and have children.

The biblical case for marriage as the natural way to live a flourishing life is indispensable. Charlie made all these points. But the argument resonated because it was also so simple. You don’t need complicated statistics and logical arguments to see that going to church, getting married, and having babies make for a fuller and happier life. Charlie delivered this message constantly to a generation that desperately needs to hear it.

But the message itself resonated because Charlie lived it. Anyone who followed Charlie knows how deeply he loved his wife and his two young children. As Wilcox and Baer noted in their piece, the most viral clip going around of Charlie Kirk is not something he said in a debate but the video of his little daughter running into his arms on a TV set. Charlie’s message about marriage and family making people happy rang true because it was so obvious that he experienced it himself. He publicly embraced, cherished, and supported his wife. He held and loved his little kids. Despite an incredibly busy travel schedule, he made sure to make the sacrifices to be home with his family as often as possible. Charlie’s message of “get married, have babies” was so effective because he lived it authentically. It was clear that this was the happiest, most meaningful part of his own life. 

Finally, Charlie encouraged marriage not just in his public speeches and his personal witness, but in the many private interactions with the people around him. There are many stories of Charlie spending time with everyone from students at the campuses where he debated to employees at Turning Point USA, encouraging them to embrace marriage and to have children. Charlie was a shining star, a public example of the centrality of marriage and family who practiced what he preached. And his friends listened. 

Perhaps Charlie’s most common message was “if you want to have a happy life, get married and have children.” But Charlie’s witness was not limited to telling young people to get married and have kids. He actively supported the families around him. In a beautiful tribute to Charlie, his good friend Vice President JD Vance remembered how Charlie would check in with him and ask how his kids were handling the difficulties of media attention and constant security. From junior staffers to the Vice President of the United States, Charlie’s witness to family life was obvious to everyone who knew him. As Vice President Vance said yesterday:

He was a great family man….Charlie was so proud of Erika and the two kids. He was so happy to be a father. And he felt such gratitude for having found a woman of God with whom he could build a family.

So, what do we take from all this? First of all, Charlie’s influence on the nation and particularly on the American right will be felt for years to come, perhaps more through his death than if he had lived longer. Charlie leaves a powerful legacy as a public witness to the importance, the beauty, and the goodness of marriage and family life; that witness will continue to resonate and encourage the coming generation to embrace family life. 

And Charlie’s life offers us not just a message but a blueprint: if we really care about restoring a pro-family culture, we need to be witnesses in our words and our relationships. We must love our spouses and our children above our careers and worldly ambitions. We must be willing to share that priority with the people in our lives. And to the extent we have the platform and the opportunity, we must publicly share both the arguments and our personal example with the world. To honor and continue Charlie’s legacy, let us each witness to the goodness of marriage and family life through the words we speak, the relationships we nurture, and the way we live our daily lives.

Frank DeVito is senior counsel and director of content at the Napa Legal Institute. His work has previously been published in The American Conservative, the Federalist, Public Discourse, the Daily Wire, First Things, The Claremont Review of Books, and several other publications. He lives in eastern Pennsylvania with his wife and five children. The views expressed in this article are those of the author and not necessarily his employer.